Wednesday, March 5, 2008

it'sy bit'sy nightmare


As I mentioned, last night B and I had dinner with (K), a college professor who teaches writing locally. We revered and dissected writing and grammar (convention) every which way, over margaritas, in hopes of gleaning useful ideas for teaching our kids at home.

This meeting has inspired me to say two things.:

A) Brandy is officially debuting as "B," which I have always called her, and which she has readily accepted as an alternative to/antidote for, her long-detested Brandy. So please join me in bidding adieu to the moniker that has brought her so much loathing, and let us celebrate the uber-cool B. (I hope I haven't cheapened the hype by not knowing how to use umlauts on a computer. I should have called Adam...)

B) If I were a super hero, I would be Picky Grammar Bitch. (I know I know, I wouldn't be very popular.) I see rampant and flagrant misuse of everything from spelling, to diction, to punctuation, everywhere I look, and I just have to vent a little, lest I resort to cutting. Now, I am, by no means, an expert, but I inarguably care more about this than virtually anyone else within a hundred, er, million mile radius. I am not out to embarrass or scold anyone, I just want to spruce things up a bit, in a helpful way.

Okay, so the most pervasive problem I see is the use or non-use of an apostrophe in the words its and it's. Here's your out.: The confusion lies in the fact that its is one word that is not made possessive by an apostrophe. If one were talking about Bob, and his books, one would say Bob's books. But if one were referencing the library, and its books, there would be no apostrophe, even though it's (it is) possessive. The apostrophe is used as a contraction, not for possession. Does that make sense? Am I a bitch? Wait don't answer. They are both rhetorical.

It's rude and ego-centric of me to post this.
But that doesn't minimize its validity.
It's something I will likely regret.
And its relevance only matters to me.

Feel free to hack apart my writing and show me what a hypocrite I am.

It's only fair.

8 comments:

gail said...

now i'm paranoid - it's not something i have done, is it? PGB would be cool, i tend to spot these types of mistakes as well. i hope....

Brandy Kinch said...

"Its relevance only matters to me" is redundant :) Relevance is the same as matters. Thanks for announcing my name change. Feel bashful about it but I've been getting used to ppl calling me B (Bea? Bee?) and it's jus better.

Hennifer said...

Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!

I always mess those up. I know it is horrible. I suck. Thank you! I think I can actually remember that now that you've put those lovely examples.

Looking at all you lovely ladies lovely writing I may never blog again however. There is this thing where you can rate the reading level of your blog, have you seen this? I got a grade school rating. How very truly sad!

Cheyenne said...

you are wrong.

the matter of its relevance is of consequence to me alone.

this is not redundant. whether or not it is relevant may not be of interest (or, matter) to you guys, but it is of interest (or matters) to me.

and what the hell is jus?

love you B.

adam said...

Speaking of mistakes, you might want to take a look at the following sentence...

Here's your out.:

Holy punctuation, PGB!!! Quick! To the Grammar-mobile!

Cheyenne said...

you know adam, i didn't even see that period when i proofread!

i can assure you, this is not a case of error, it is a case of littering.

thanks for coming out of hiding to skin me alive though--how awesome!

xoxo

Sam said...

Well... you may be uninvited to my blog if I start getting emails with all my grammar mistakes.

:P (with a smile)

mamakendra said...

I know I am not perfect, but I am one of those freaky point out all the typos/miswordings kind of person too. Although, not nearly as...educated? pointy? freakishly? whatever...as you are.